Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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