either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
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