I swear she didn't look like that last week.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
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and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
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Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.