So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Randomize
