she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Randomize
