R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
