and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
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