Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...