do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
