Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
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