There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
