Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Randomize
