i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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