I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Randomize