So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
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I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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