It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Well I just put wine in my tea
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
