listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
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