dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
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