saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
I yelled at your uterus for you.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
