haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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