Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
