You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
