Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
