"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Little spoons don't ask big questions
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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