We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
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