You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
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