So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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