the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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