VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
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