On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
