Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
