Will you blow on my dice?
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
