question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Randomize
