Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
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