D3 body, D1 cock
i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize