Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
