if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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