white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
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