took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
