Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone came in the potted fern
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Randomize