hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize