It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
