benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
i need some magic done to my vagina
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
