Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Randomize