Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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