i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful