Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
You're a waste of cheezeits
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
