Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Success! We fucked roommates!
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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