:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Randomize
