I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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