Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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