two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Randomize
